Forget It, Brother, You Can Go It Alone!

I go it alone a lot. There are a lot of events and places where I'd rather have accompaniment, but my friends are often uninterested, unwilling, and/or unable to join me when I do ask. Some live too far, some have families, some live too far and have families... As a result, I've just gotten into the habit of going and doing what I want, when I want, instead of trying to convince or coordinate with someone else.

Of course, having a strong introvert streak and the occasional bout of social anxiety both makes it easier to do things on my own and makes it harder to interact with others when there isn't someone there to provide some social lubricant. Last month in D.C., I opted to buy a ticket to the "Can't Stop the Science" event after the March for Science, then almost talked myself out of going. I did make my way out there in the end, and found myself standing alone at a bar table for a few minutes until, as luck would have it, a social scientist happened by and asked if she could share the table. Over the next hour or so, another six people came and went at different times, and I found myself in various conversations with my newfound tablemates.

Last weekend, I went to the Parkside Lounge in NYC to take in a live science fiction comedy show, "Wild Women of Planet Wongo." It's an interactive show, and one of the aforementioned Wild Women (or Wongettes) approached me during a dance number and told me she needed a partner, and she'd teach me the dance. I was taken aback, but the Wongotini I'd consumed earlier probably eased my acquiescence, and I attempted to keep up with her during the alien dancing. After the show was over, I got a picture with Maya, the actress playing the Wongette, and we chatted for a bit; she commended me for coming to the show alone, and we remarked on how we both prefer to do things solo than to skip 'em when we can't find someone with whom to go.

Yes, I got leid, too

A few days later, I was back in Manhattan to see Tania Stavreva perform again. I usually feel a little awkward and out of place at the receptions afterwards when she has them, and this time wasn't much different. I did talk with Jon Ososki, another musician I'd met at Tania's last performance, a bit. After a few minutes of solitary standing, I noticed a woman out of the corner of my eye; she looked like she was preparing to approach me, but surely-

She did. She came up to me and smiled, said hi, asked if this had been the first time I'd seen Tania perform, which led to my explaining how I'd met the pianist through Goli, the Cambridge band I'd found accidentally one night at Caffe Vivaldi. We talked for a while, joined eventually by an indie filmmaker named Bryan (and I then found out that my temporary companion was a script supervisor named Marilyn), before she became ensnared in another conversation and I found myself... well, kinda alone again. Naturally.

I do have friends, of course, and I do see them and get out with them. Over the past month, I've seen the Revolution in concert with Rhonda and Jenn, gone to Lambertville's Shadfest with Barbara, had drinks and watched "Alien: Covenant" with Yesika, and spent a fun day in New York with Dawn. I see my parents every other weekend and celebrated my dad's birthday with them yesterday (it's today). While Greta's Unmentionables will apparently split up, we'll do so amicably, and there's still Not An Exit as an outlet for creative collaboration. And I am very much looking forward to seeing Mel, Joyce, and Sue in a month when we tackle Key West together.

But for all that, when I hear about Chris Cornell's suicide, and I'm reminded that Jeff Buckley died twenty years ago today (I'm listening to Grace right now), and I see myself doing more on my own than I do with others, I can't help but feel pretty damned alone. Sometimes.

Love is not a victory march,
  It's a cold and it's a broken Hallelujah...

Resist!

In the four weeks since this regime has been in power, I've marched against the immigrant / refugee / Muslim ban and taken part in yesterday's general strike. (In fact, I'm even mentioned in a Village Voice article about the latter.)

Me in Washington Sq. Park; photo by Daniel Albanese / TheDustyRebel

In my last 'blog post, just hours before the inauguration, I expressed a willingness to give Donald Trump a chance, and a desire to have my concerns proven groundless. Well, we all know how that's turned out. Firstly, he's way too thin-skinned for the position. If the poor little snowflake can't take the same level of abuse that Barack Obama took from him and others without getting defensive and petty, then maybe it's time to retire. And stop the fascist attacks on the press. Maybe his die-hard fans believe that the media is their enemy, but true lovers of liberty know better. Sure, some outlets do show a bias, in one direction or another, and the media does share in the blame for getting this mess elected (as do we, the people) by not taking him seriously enough until it was too late, but it is clearly more important than ever that we have a free press that can hold his (and any) administration accountable for its actions. (If you want to let Trump's people know what you think about what they think about the media, take their survey here.)

In addition, the Petulant has appointed agency heads who seem intent on destroying those agencies (Betsy DeVos - Secretary of "Education"; Scott Pruitt - Administrator of the EPA; Tom Price - Secretary of HHS; Ryan Zinke - Secretary of the Interior... at least we avoided getting the Putz as Secretary of Labor). We get alternative facts lies almost daily from the Ministry of Propaganda's Sean Spicer, Kellyanne Conway, Reince Priebus, Stephen Miller, or Trump himself. Repeating something often and loudly enough does not make it any less false. And you're not going to distract us from Michael Flynn's very real and possibly illegal sanctions discussions with the Russian government before his short-lived appointment, or the Russian attempts to influence the election (which popular vote you still lost). House Oversight Committee Chairman Jason Chaffetz needs to investigate these issues, and Conway's Ivanka Trump commercial, and Donald's North Korea discussions with Japanese Prime Minister Abe out in the open at Mar-a-Lago.

Then there's the travel ban, which has already had a negative impact even on citizens and legal residents of the US. And Democratic Hispanic members of Congress being deliberately excluded from a meeting with the acting director of Immigration and Customs Enforcement (ICE), a meeting one of them (Rep. Luis V. Gutiérrez (D-IL)) had called for in the first place. And the media blackout at some federal agencies (which happily resulted in some of those employees going rogue). And the blind eye regarding science, which probably has to do with all those non-alternative facts. And the absolutely asinine decision to go ahead with the Dakota Access and the Keystone XL pipelines, and to attack the unarmed civilians at Standing Rock. And baseless ranting accusations about voter fraud. And re-filling, rather than draining, the swamp. And potential conflicts of interest that Trump says presidents aren't subject to. And let's not forget the sad, pathetic wall.

Let's not lose sight of the big picture, either, or allow ourselves to become sidetracked. I don't want to consider, or believe, that the man approximately half of America voted into the White House is paving the way to a fascist state (through his own design or the Dark Lord Sauron Steve Bannon's or anyone else's)... but consider it I must. If the administration continues to insist on denying facts as produced by science or reported on by the press, and we just stand by and let them without holding them to account, then our constitutional federal republic is at risk of becoming... something else entirely.

I don't know yet if I'm going to attend tomorrow's "Today, I Am A Muslim Too" rally in Times Square, though I support it regardless. I am definitely taking part in the Washington, D.C. March for Science on Earth Day. I'm going to keep raising my voice in protest every time I think this administration does something to hurt what this country and its people stand for. Not everyone can make every (or even any) protest or rally or march, and I understand that... but we owe it to ourselves, and each other, and the nation (and the world!) to speak up, to stand up, to rise up- and to resist.

And hey, it's easy enough to take part in the Ides of Trump postal event.  :-)